*********************************TRAppED********************************

Forty-Eight: In the Ripples of Victory

By Annie

2003-07-18

**************************************************************************** **

Day Thirty-Seven.

7.41 p.m.

She held onto him so tightly that he thought she was going to break his neck, but then her grip slowly eased up and she moved her head to look up at him.

She had seemed possessed, her eyes had been glowing yellow, but now the green in them shone up at him as a smile grew onto her lips and he returned it. She looked revived, somehow.

"What happened?" he asked.

"Our plan worked," she replied simply. "We won."

He nodded, almost in disbelief that he had been part of it, and then she put her arms around him again, hugging him hard. She let him go, swirled around while at the same time slipping one of her hands into his before starting towards the exit, pulling him with her and he followed.

She slowed her steps as they took her passed Adam's lifeless body, looking down at it she paused for one third of a second before she turned her head to Spike instead. This time he smiled tryingly at her and she smiled back, drawing a small breath before they proceeded up to the door.

Buffy kept her hold on Spike's hand as they walked through the larger room where she had fought the soldier formally known as Forest. She knew the thing he had been transformed into was dead, Spike must have killed him.

So much carnage. Just as Adam had wanted it. But now the bodies of those killed would rest in peace.

The Slayer and the Vamp pushed through the barricade in front of the exit and joined the Scoobies in the connecting room.

"Buffy," Giles said as he, Willow and Xander all turned their heads to Spike and her.

Willow came up to them, smiling excitedly as she hugged Buffy and said:

"Wasn't it amazing?"

Buffy nodded, hugging her back. As they broke apart again Xander stated:

"You were great."

"WE were great," Buffy corrected him.

And she meant it. She had felt how they had been there. It had been Giles' thoughts translating the words he spoke through her so that she could understand them, it had been Willow who promoted the final destruction of the core and it had been Xander who linked the three of them with her as all of them brought forth the ancient strength of her legacy.

A few moments later they were all moving toward the door, the body of a killed demon laying sprawled to the right of it and Buffy made a mental note to ask what that was all about just as she kicked the door off its hinges. Soon they were battling their way out of the Initiative; unaware that cross country, in a federal building, a group of suits and uniforms were just discussing why they needed to shut the project to control the demonic world down. Why they needed to terminate the experiment of creating their own version of it, and harness its power.

The Initiative was no more.

***

9.05 p.m.

Buffy had successfully ignored the dirty looks Xander kept giving her hand which was holding Spike's in a firm grip as they walked the streets toward where they would all split up in different directions. No one spoke, but they still shared something not unlike quiet satisfaction. The city in which they lived was once again safe. Though it couldn't really relate to the word in the way it should as there were beasts still stalking the shadows - but the group was content in the knowledge that there wouldn't be anything luring them far OUT of those shadows, at least not for another while.

Willow sent Buffy smiles, encouraging and filled with friendly warmth; Buffy returned them easily and in between them she stole glances at Spike, who turned his head to her each time she did with a look in his eyes that she couldn't construe. It was as though he wanted to tell her something, but couldn't find the right approach.

They all came to a stop at the crossroads where they were parting. Xander looked from one to the other, though his eyes barely graced Spike and then finally stopped in Buffy's. She met them steadily and then tried a smile, which he barely returned and she released Spike's hand to walk up to the other and wrap her arms around him in a tight embrace.

"I love you, you know," she whispered in his ear and she could feel his hold on her grow tighter as well, which made a small smile spread on her lips as she closed her eyes. "We'll talk in the morning," she added, pulling away from him and he nodded.

"Good job," he then said with a small shrug, elaborating: "With the slaying and all."

She smiled wider at that.

"You too," she replied and he smirked a little before turning to Giles, shaking his hand and saying good night.

After hugging Willow so hard he practically lifted her off the ground he then turned and went on his way.

Giles stepped up to Buffy and embraced her gently.

"I am as proud of you as ever I was," he said and she smiled again, feeling the pride she herself felt at those words swell in her chest as they let each other go. "We'll talk in the morning too. And you," he added, turning to Willow who raised her eyebrows quizzically: "Nicely done," he commended and she smiled before they hugged as well.

Spike was about to scoff at the display of warmth and affection, but then Giles fixed his gaze on him and tentatively reached out one hand. The vampire stared at him, then at the limb held out to him, before he just as hesitatingly took it in a tight grip.

Looking up again the Watcher held his gaze for a few long seconds and then inclined his head the fraction of an inch before he let the other's hand go. Spike blinked, wondering what exactly this exchange had meant.

Without further ado, however, Giles turned and went on his way.

The three left stood still for a short while, then looked at each other and started to walk as well. Buffy once more taking Spike's hand, and all of them once more staying silent as they headed toward the college dorms. As the buildings began to grow into view Buffy was overcome with the sudden sense of how tired she actually was.

The relief of having it all being done with, the fact that her largest threat had been defeated. The strain her body and mind as well as her spirit had been under at that last confrontation. And the true happiness she felt as she knew she had been dreadfully wrong in one aspect all along - she would NEVER stand alone, no matter what was up ahead; her friends would always be there with her. All of this was getting the better of her and she longed for bed, for rest.

Willow punched in the code to the front door and they all filed through it. The quiet of the inside folded itself upon them and for some reason it grew pressing in a way it hadn't been outdoors. They walked up the stairs and Spike slowed Buffy's and his steps as they approached the door of Willow and hers room.

Willow turned her head to them, as though wondering where they had gone, and then she smiled before she stopped and walked back up to them.

"I can take a hint," she smirked with a glance at Spike, who returned the expression as she put her arms around Buffy. "Every year there's something," the redhead muttered and Buffy suppressed a giggle, and then she nodded. "But at least we're the ones coming out standing," the former added and Buffy squeezed her a little tighter before they pulled away from the other.

Willow turned to Spike and again there was hesitation before she quickly embraced him as well. She looked a little sheepish as she backed away, seemingly waiting for some kind of livid or perhaps merely clear reaction of objection from him.

Spike couldn't oblige her. For the first time he felt a twirl of something very close to appreciation inside as he looked down at the Wicca and saw it appear in her eyes as well. He was so surprised by it that his brain short- circuited and he couldn't even get out a "good night".

Willow gave them both another smile and then made herself scarce as she walked up to the door and through it, leaving them alone.

Buffy looked up at him, a smile still playing in the corners of her mouth at the obvious confusion in his eyes.

"Is it so hard to understand?" she asked and he turned his gaze questioningly in hers. "You did good tonight," she said. "A lot of it. Is it so unbelievable that they saw that, and acknowledged it?"

He sighed, closing his eyes.

"Yeah," he then grumbled and she put her arms around him, stepping into him and nestling her face against his throat as his arms slid around her and held her to him.

They stood still for such a long time Buffy felt her eyelids begin to grow heavy with sleep. She didn't want to let him go, though, and so she merely leaned on him.

"Tired?" he asked softly and she murmured something he couldn't quite make out before she pulled back to look up at him.

"I should've come with YOU instead," she moaned and he smiled a small smile before shaking his head.

"Go to bed and have a good night's sleep," he merely replied. "I take it there's a lotta stuff that's gonna need sortin' out in the morning," he added and she furrowed her brow at the reminder.

"I always have a good night's sleep when I'm sleeping next to you," she then mumbled, not able to suppress a yawn and his smile broadened.

"Stop arguing," he instructed, his arms letting her go and then one of his hands gently pushed her towards her door.

"I'm usually not like this," she stated soberly and now he smirked. "Usually I'm awake for hours after a face off like that... I don't understand why I'm so exhausted."

"Buffy," he said, making her look him in the eye before he leaned forward and kissed her tenderly on the lips. "I'll see you in the morning."

"Thank you," she stopped him as he was turning to leave and he looked back at her. "For saving my life."

He smiled again.

"That's three times you owe me, love," he stated and she returned the smile at that.

Watching him for a few seconds as he once again made as to walk away she reached out a hand and took a hold on the leather of his duster. He frowned slightly, once more turning his head to her and she smiled a little.

"Stay," she said; her voice sounding close to commanding as well as offering.

He looked uncomprehending as she turned the knob of the door and pushed it open before she pulled him with her through the doorway, his eyes growing wondering as he stepped through it and her smile broadened. She closed the door silently, though she was rather certain Willow wasn't asleep yet.

"Buffy," Spike whispered, almost sounding afraid that she wasn't in her rightful mind and she hushed him gently as she began to undress.

He swallowed, his gaze landing on her bed.

She helped him off with the duster and then signed for him to get the rest off on his own accord as she sneaked up to her dresser and got a top and a pair of pajama bottoms out for herself. She smirked as he seemed uncertain whether to remove his pants or not, glancing over at the outlining of Willow in her bed.

"Don't be shy," Buffy whispered and he turned his gaze in hers as she added with a much too teasing tone of voice: "Willow's seen one before and besides, she's not even into them anymore."

Spike could have sworn he heard a muffled giggle coming from the dark lump that was the Wicca, and directing a suspicious glare that way he then slid the piece of clothing off.

"Come here," Buffy said as she reached out a hand to him, already seated on her own bed and he approached her cautiously, looking down at her as she crawled under the covers and then moved them aside as an invitation for him to join.

He slid down beside her and she put the covers over him before she contentedly made him put his arms around her as she rested her head against his chest.

"This is how I wanna fall asleep from now on," she mumbled and he smiled, nodding his consent. "Can you promise me you'll never be farther away than this?"

"No," he murmured quietly, "but I can promise I'll try never to be farther away."

"Kiss," she said; voice now so drowsy with sleep that the word sounded more like "kish".

And he graced the top of her head with one before he closed his eyes as well.

***

Day Thirty-Eight.

3.02 a.m.

There was something undefined creeping along the seams of her dreams. It was a dark and obscure blot on the otherwise peaceful contents and she tried to fend it away, but it was too far out of her reach.

It circled right outside her line of sight as she faced her mother and her father.

"But they WERE there!" she exclaimed, staring from one beloved and trusted face to another; seeing them stare back with disbelief and trepidation.

Her mother's eyes filled with tears before she suddenly turned away, leaving the rest of the confrontation up to her husband. Buffy had tears welling up as well, as her father put on a stern face and leaned slightly closer - the way he always did when he wanted to convey a point.

"I will not hear any more of this from you," he said, voice lowered and trembling with what she didn't want to label angered impatience because she needed his understanding.

If anyone should support her now it would be her father, and her mother. But...

"Not another word!" he continued. "There are no excuses for setting FIRE to a building! There are no explanations you can give your mother and me that would EVER be liable, but paranormal beings on a killing rampage shouldn't be your FIRST option!"

"You SAW them!" she burst out.

"Buffy, sweetheart," Joyce cut in, turning back to her as she swiped at her tears and then reached out her hands to her. "You just experienced something terribly traumatic and your mind is trying to... Fantasy beings is simply your subconscious' way of telling yourself that what you did..."

Buffy frowned, shaking her head.

"I SAVED you! I SAVED those kids in there and then I KILLED the vampires that tried to slaughter us all! And I'm not sorry, I won't ever say I'm sorry and I won't ever change my story to fit yours - do you HEAR me?!" she bellowed, her tears flooding her cheeks as both her parent's eyes grew huge at her words. "NEVER!" she finished before she turned and ran out of the room.

The door closed behind her and she was in the desert. Sand was all that surrounded her, all that she seemed to feel, as though she was a giant hourglass and the sand was slipping through her veins instead of blood - counting down the hours she had left on the earth.

The sky was black above her head, but the sand glistened as though studded with diamonds and suddenly everything began to grow pink and orange and fire-y red moments before a golden line in the horizon pronounced the sun slowly rising.

Buffy could hear the voice she had heard right after Adam had fallen into a lifeless heap at her feet.

And it still whispered its words gently.

As the sun rises...

And still there was that shadow of something else, something uncomfortable waiting to make its move.

She frowned and then turned her head, the desert scenery melting away around her and Sunnydale slipped forth instead, the front porch of her house taking central stage as she looked into Spike's eyes and he raised his eyebrows rather meaningfully. She knew that the moment had come. Turning back to her mother she then took the step up to her and said:

"Mom, I'm a vampire slayer."

"What do you think she's thinking?" Spike asked as Joyce was put on pause, staring blankly at her daughter and Buffy eyed her - at first surprised at the sight and then frowning.

"I don't know," she answered the vampire.

"Do you think she approves?" he wondered and she shrugged.

"She didn't HATE Angel, I'm sure she'll be okay with it," she replied and Spike cocked an eyebrow, moving around to stand behind Joyce and looking over her shoulder at his love.

"You really think so?" he asked skeptically, brushing Joyce's hair away from her neck and opening his mouth, moving his head as though to bite before he stopped himself and chuckled, shaking his head. "Right," he sighed. "Almost forgot," he added, straightening his back and looking back at Buffy with a smirk. "It's a curse, is what it is," he muttered and she raised her eyebrows again. "The chip..."

"Right," she nodded, smiling at him. "Of course."

"So," he said, moving around Joyce to take a place behind Buffy instead, slipping his arms around her as he watched Joyce's face in the same manner Buffy was, "you think she'll be happy that you're with me?"

"Yeah," Buffy nodded, leaning back. "I think she will be. She wants what's best for me."

"Me?" Spike wondered and she smiled as she turned around in his arms and looked up at him before nodding slowly.

"You," she then confirmed and he returned her smile before he bent down to join their lips.

That was when the desert poured back in all its gilded glory and at the sudden light Buffy opened her eyes. She stared into his, and they grew slowly before he looked up and into the widening stretch of glittering gold continuingly rising above the horizon.

"Spike," she whispered as he looked down at her and then he started to glow with the fire beginning to consume him from within.

"Don't worry," he said gently.

She woke with a sharp breath and turned her head immediately to the sleeping form of her lover still lying next to her. Relaxing as he was still there she drew another, though this time small, breath and then smiled a little. Listening to his soft breathing she closed her eyes and placed her head on his chest again.

She still had the unsettling sense of being watched by something just outside her line of comprehension, it fluttered there and disturbed her worse now than it had while she was still asleep.

Another thing clouded her mind as well, making it all the more troublesome to relax so that she once again could drift off; she couldn't stop thinking of what the dream had reminded her of.

She needed to see her mother, there seemed to be a lot they needed to talk about... And Buffy was afraid that Joyce would actually have trouble accepting Spike. She was almost certain that her mother would have a problem with yet another vampire thrust into the family... and this one lacking a soul, which would surely only enhance the older woman's difficulty in relating with him in any way.

Adam was gone, her Slayer side could rest easier for the time being.

But tomorrow she was going to talk to Xander, and to Giles and as it presented itself now also to her own mother about a man - a being - that she needed in her life more than anything right now and if they for some reason tried to talk her out of that need, if they couldn't give her their support and love in this, then she didn't know what she would do.

She decided to push all of it out of her thoughts, there was nothing she could do about it right this instant was there?

She finally slipped back into her dreams, though the disturbance of something undefined following her stayed close by for the rest of the night.

**************************************************************************** **************************************************************************** **************************************************************************** ******************

*********************************TRAppED**********************************

Forty-Nine: Let's Talk About It

By Annie

2003-07-30

****************************************************************************

Day Thirty-Eight.

8.30 a.m.

"...all stuffed with fluff, he's Winnie the Pooh, Winnie the Pooh; silly, nilly, willy old bear..."

His eyes opened and met hers as a smile spread across his lips. Her voice had gently disturbed his dreams and as he now looked at her a feeling of pure pleasure flooded his chest. Putting up a hand by her cheek he stroked his thumb over it and then he asked:

"You serenading me, love?"

"With the theme from Winnie the Pooh?" she asked back, a smirk occurring on her mouth and he chuckled.

"Hey, you could be Piglet," he offered and she giggled as well.

"That could get disgusting," she remarked and his smile widened considerably before he moved his arms and hooked his hands in her armpits, pulling her up so that he could kiss the tip of her nose.

Nudging his own along the side of it he then joined their lips softly.

Pulling apart she rested her forehead against his and closed her eyes.

"I dreamed about you," she mumbled.

"Was it a good dream?" he asked and she felt an ache somewhere close to her heart before she opened her eyes again and looked into his.

"Yeah," she then lied; not wanting to deal with the explanation she knew she would owe him if she said that it had been down right terrifying, not wanting to disrupt the comfort. "Yeah, it was a really good dream."

He turned his head to look over at the room's second bed, which was now empty as well as neatly made.

"Where's Red?" he wondered.

"She rises at dawn, I swear," Buffy muttered, then smiled as she sat up, collecting her hair to throw it over one shoulder as she kept her eyes in his. "Notice anything... different?" she inquired and he narrowed his eyes as he tried to see a change somewhere on her.

"Only lack of frenzy on you, pet," he finally concluded and her gaze grew even a few degrees warmer as she reached out and slipped her fingers to lock with his.

"I think I once told you that you know me way too well," she said and he cocked an eyebrow questioningly. "I wasn't exaggerating," she added and he grinned before he squeezed her hand a little.

"Now you're just bloody buttering me up... I scent a favor closing in..." he said and her eyes grew into pure innocence before she once again smiled, this time sweetly.

"Well, there is the lack of frenzy - you were SO completely right about that," she replied and he blinked, a meaningful expression taking a firm place on his features and she bit her lower lip before she continued: "But there's also the obvious need and severe hope that you'll grant me that inclosing favor and... come with me to see my mom this afternoon," she confessed, the last part so quickly that a human ear would most likely have been unable to perceive it.

However, both of Spike's ears suffered no such malfunction and he heard every word. They made his eyes grow into shock as he sat up and stared at her.

"Well... you don't need ME to come with you and see her," he stated, the trace of a question imbedded in the sentence. "I mean... bloody hell, Slayer, wouldn't she take to wondering what the hell I was doing back at her doorstep?"

Buffy shifted slightly in her seat when he let her hand go and removed the sheet, which had been covering his legs, in order to move to the side of the bed; opposite the one by which she was sitting. She looked at his back and then crawled over to him, leaning into him from behind and putting her arms around him before she rested her head in the cranny of his neck.

"No, she wouldn't wonder," she said and he turned his head to glance at her over his shoulder. "'Cause I'd explain it to her," she added and now he twisted his upper-body to once again ogle her, this time in clear disbelief.

"You don't have to do that," he grumbled, but she smiled once more, shaking her head a little at him.

"Do what - exactly?" she inquired gently.

"Turn everything upside down!" he answered, getting to his feet and spinning around to face her as her hands settled in her lap.

She furrowed her brow before replying:

"'Everything' is finally clicking into place! Can't you see?"

They simply eyed each other for a few short minutes and then Buffy stood as well, took the step up to him and wrapped her arms around him again.

"Don't you understand?" she asked as he tentatively held her back. "I want you in my life. And I want everybody to know it. That's how we can start..."

She trailed off, tilting her head back slightly to look up at him. He met her gaze and held it, then at last a smile formed on his mouth and she returned it with relief zooming through her nerves as she began to relax.

"You'll go with me?" she asked hopefully.

"I'll go with you," he confirmed and she smiled even brighter as she hugged him hard.

Releasing him she ran her hands down his chest in a tender caress before she turned away from him and said:

"I really dislike covering that magnificent body of yours - but Willow could walk through that door at any moment, and so perhaps you should put something on."

He smirked as he watched her begin to make the bed.

"Thought you said I shouldn't be shy," he pointed out. "Thought you said she wasn't 'into them' anymore."

He received a pillow in the face for that comment.

***

9.36 a.m.

Xander looked up when the door to Giles' apartment opened, and when he laid eyes on the two trotting rather insecurely through it he looked away with a tightening jaw line. Buffy drew a small breath and turned her head to Giles who came into the room from the kitchen. He gave her a greeting nod and then looked at Spike, who tried to keep a flare of arrogance about him, but had to admit to himself that it was a struggle.

He had never respected the Watcher until the moment the latter extended a hand to him the night prior. Now that respect seemed to expand into making it hard for the vampire to focus on anything at all as he realized that Giles was signing for him to come with him.

Buffy gave him an encouraging glance and he let the hand go, which he had been holding in an extremely firm grip ever since they left her dorm room fifteen minutes earlier, as he tried to send her the same emotion - knowing that she would now try to speak with Xander.

The Slayer and the Vamp split up and went to face whatever unknown terror might be up ahead.

Buffy went around to sit down on the couch next to Xander, who was gritting his teeth and twining his hands with stiff movements, ardently refusing to grant her even the slightest indication that he understood she was there.

She braced herself, then began to speak.

"I know it was a shock," she said. "I can't say I saw it coming myself. I mean, how could I have? I'd never disliked someone with such seethe before in my entire life! I couldn't even have imagined that all of a sudden he'd change my opinion of him so... drastically that I - now - actually find myself needing him... with me... Xander?" She paused, trying to make him look at her as she finished: "If you could just try..."

"To what?!" he interrupted, his voice low with the trepidation he felt at seeing her doing this - pleading that thing's case like this. "To see him through your eyes? Spare me the soap-bit, Buffy. I can't see him as anything but what he is. Sorry to have to disappoint you. Sorry to rob you of the silver lined ending."

She frowned, then shook her head.

"I don't want that," she stated. "I don't want you to lie and say you're okay with it. I don't want you to HAVE to. I can only ask this of you: that you try to understand, as my friend, that to ME he means something more; and that I can't change that simply 'cause you're having trouble accepting it. As for the 'seeing him for what he is' part I can't do anything but say wait and you might get to see just that. And once you do I believe that you'll change your mind about him, just like I did."

"Save the melodramatic punch lines," he snarled, rising to his feet. "They leave a bad taste in my mouth."

"Why do you hate him, Xander?" she asked, though she thought she might already know the answer she was still unsure whether Xander even knew it himself.

He paused, back to her, and then he turned around with an incredulous look on his face.

"Why?!" he exclaimed.

"Yeah..." she mumbled.

"The trying-to-take-you-down, the kidnapping-Willow-and-me, the trying-to- BITE-Willow, the never-ever-seizing-plans-for-destruction - those AREN'T enough of a reason for you?!" he barked and Buffy tried to remain calm as she looked up at him from where she was still seated.

"I think it runs deeper," she replied simply and before he could bellow another protest she hurriedly continued: "I think it has to do with your first introduction to this world we're living in... and the creatures that inhabit it..." He stared at her now, the anger and something dreadfully resembling hurt twirled in his gaze, but he waited for her to finish what she had begun and so she did, with: "I think deep down all of them stand for what killed Jesse."

He swallowed hard, then turned from her again about a moment too late to hide the shining tears filling his eyes.

"I know Spike has done so much harm. I know he might not deserve a second chance. But I'm asking you," she now said as she rose and slowly approached one of her absolute best friends, stopping right behind him as she added: "to please, give it to him. I'm not saying you need to like him... I'm just asking you to tolerate him. Please! For my sake."

"Buffy," Xander grumbled, moving his hands over his cheeks to dry the salt off of them before he turned his head to look at her. "He doesn't deserve to even rest his eyes on you, much less a second chance..." As he trailed off she felt her heart flutter with sudden hope and as Xander shook his head a little she felt it leap. "He's NOT a Scoob," Xander warned and Buffy threw herself around his neck in a harsh embrace which had him practically on his knees begging her to go easy on him.

She apologized with another smile as she made sure there seemed to be no signs of inner injuries and then she hugged him again, this time a bit more normal and he held her close to him in the protective way that he so often adopted around her.

"Who could ever resist you," Xander muttered and she laughed softly, patting his back before she pulled away from him.

"See," she then said, "I think you're already starting to understand him."

***

9.40 a.m.

Giles waited for Spike to step through the door of the guest bedroom before he closed it behind their backs and turned to the vampire. He had never seen the bleached blonde in such obvious lack of words and felt a need to smile over it, though he successfully managed to suppress it. He had the upper hand already as it was; there was no need to rub it in.

Spike glanced about his surroundings, at the tasteful decorating of bookshelves all filled with rare volumes and the large oak bed standing to his right. The room had such a clear English air to it that Spike could do nothing but be reminded of how the man now before him had more in common with him than he would have liked to admit.

"I have no proof as of this day that would tell me to trust you," Giles picked up the thread of speech and Spike fixed his eyes in his as he listened with rising worry, when the Watcher seemed to wait for a response Spike raised his eyebrows.

"No," he then agreed. "No proof at all. 'Xept maybe the me-helping-you-lot- yesterday... perhaps?" he then tried and Giles had the shadow of a smile grace his lips before he replied:

"And how can I know that that was not to serve your own purpose?"

Spike blinked.

"The purpose being something profoundly evil thus I helped to save your lives?" he then asked, growing just a tad aggravated and Giles eyed him for a moment before he said:

"You are older than me, by far. You possess, I am quite sure, wisdom regarding this earth and how to live on it which I shall never even come close to... I made a choice a long while back to pass from the line of doing nothing good and onto the path of something truer - something stronger. The saying 'good shall overcome' is not for not, as I am certain you are aware."

He paused and Spike grew slightly confused where the topic was headed; noticing this the former made the decision to go where he had set out to and continued with:

"In my younger and more foolish days I did some things of which I am not necessarily proud, but still they taught me to... see the good from the evil. They taught me not to be deceived or misled. The things I was involved in gave me one of the more important lessons of my life as they showed me where I did not want to be; where I never wanted to end up. At times you remind me of myself, Spike. You are reckless and a rebel... you want things the way YOU want them, and not the way they are and so you set out to either change them entirely - or simply destroy them. I do not know what has possessed you into changing lanes, Spike. Is it Buffy? Or is it merely the thought of her that serves as that trigger to change it all - or leave it utterly destroyed? Are you thinking of her... William?" Spike's posture grew slightly rigid at that, but Giles had yet to finish as he added: "Or is this another one of those mindless fix ideas that will not let you rest until thoroughly explored? What causes concern is not you telling yourself that it is true - but you telling her. Because, in case you failed to notice, she believes you as only she can when she sets her mind to it: with her whole heart. She cares for you, a great deal. It surprised me greatly to see it, I confess, but it also scared me in a way you never have been able to before. You are stronger than I, immensely so - but if you have set yourself out to cause her pain I swear to you it will return to you tenfold."

He seemed to be done. Spike stared at him with a blend of enraged astonishment moving around his heart. This had not been what he had been expecting.

"I won't cause her pain," he murmured, clearing his throat before he added with even more conviction: "I love her. More than you will ever know. And I was bloody appalled at first! For even... wanting her. But I couldn't fight it. She is everything I need to feel..."

"Good?" Giles filled in and at that Spike had to smile tentatively.

"I suppose this still doesn't count as persuasion for you to believe me," the latter stated. "Guess it's time's job to tell if you can trust me - or not."

They eyed each other in silence for a short while and then Giles gave a nod before he said:

"It is quite ironic, if you think about it."

Spike looked quizzical.

"What is?" he then asked and Giles smiled one of his small smiles again before he inquired:

"Remember what I asked you when I came to your crypt after you completely wrecked my car and I still had to pay you the debt I owed you?"

Spike thought for a moment, and then his eyes lit up just before he nodded that he did, and a smirk drew across his features as he recalled the dramatic getaway from the soldier boys and their killers on four wheels which he had managed in Giles' wreck of a machine. Then his smirk died as he also remembered exactly how long he had been able to hold onto the money Giles was referring to, which had been less than a day since he had been shot in the back and tagged and thus had needed the Scoobies now-for-sale help to get the darn device out of him.

"I think I remember, yeah," he muttered.

"What did I ask, then?"

"I don't remember THAT," Spike replied grouchily, still thinking of his three-hundred dollars as he added: "I remember the scenario of you coming to PAY me, not-..."

"I asked you if it hadn't occurred to you that all of it - you being chipped, only fighting demons, all of that - that it might be part of a higher purpose," Giles cut in and Spike clenched his jaws together as he actually did remember that, at the time, completely ridiculous question. "Listening to you is at times a horror, Spike," the Watcher now added. "At other times quite amusing and then there are those moments where you seem to let your intelligence shine through your rough exterior and I would not be the educated man that I am if I could not see it - or let the knowledge of me seeing it be admitted. Hearing you now... Well, I may not believe in YOU per say, but I believe in Buffy and so I will be no obstacle for her. Or you."

"Is that your blessing?" Spike asked, a hint of sarcasm in his tone and Giles smiled once more, patiently.

"She is still young, Spike. You need to remember that."

"And you need to realize that she is a lot more mature than most of you seem to get," the vamp retorted. "She saves the world and I'm sure she'll keep doing that till the day it bloody... kills her," he added, the last two words causing him to stop himself and he seemed to grow self-conscious as he suddenly drifted off into musings. "She's old for her age, is all I'm saying," he finally finished, looking back at the Watcher who had removed his glasses to polish them; and now put them back in place on the bridge of his nose.

"And you are eternal," Giles said much too gently, it made the words all the more sharpened and Spike felt the urge to wince, but fought it back down.

"I love her," he murmured, it being the only comeback he could think of.

"Then I suppose you shall love her forever," Giles replied, voice still as smooth as butter and Spike swallowed as he watched the other turn and open the door, stepping through it and closing it, leaving the vampire alone with a stillness that was much too quiet.

***

12.44 p.m.

The Summers home was filled with the smells and noises of cooking. From the food on the stove and from the lady cutting up salad to in the next moment swing around and check that the rise was coming along as it should. Buffy stood in the doorway, watching her mother do five things at the same time and wondering if she would ever be able to do that. What kind of a mother would she be?

Pushing the thought away she glanced back at Spike, who was lingering in the hall - duster replaced by a dark-blue sweater and his face a mask of forced calm. She gave him a smile and he returned it right before she stepped into the other room saying:

"Smells appetizing, mom! Whatcha making?"

Joyce looked up, clearly in oblivion that her daughter had already arrived, and then she smiled widely as she came around the breakfast table in the center of the kitchen (on which the vegetable ingredients as well as the cutting board for the salad were spread out) to give the latter a huge and warm hug.

"I've missed you!" she said and Buffy returned her smile. "I thought we said, with the whole Faith ordeal, that we'd see more of each other but you don't write, you don't call - what's a mother to do?" she added and Buffy's smile widened before she looked apologetic.

"I'm so sorry! It's just... I've been a little busy," she explained.

"With the vampires?" Joyce asked in a conspiratorially tone of voice and Buffy smiled - this time wavering - before she nodded.

"Yeah... Um, mom," she said and Joyce, who now had moved back up to the stove and took the rise off it, turned her head back to her daughter with a questioning look. "I brought someone," the latter added hesitantly. "For lunch. A guest... Well, you sort of know him..."

Joyce now had her full attention back on Buffy who leaned back slightly where she stood so that she could sign for Spike to come and join them. He did, all be it on the verge of cautiously, and when he entered the kitchen Joyce stared at him. Then at Buffy. Then back at him.

"I'm sorry, where are my manners," she finally got a grip on herself before she took the steps dividing them and resolutely reached out one hand, taking one of his. "Of course you're more than welcome. Please, go ahead into the dining room - it's right in there. Buffy, would you stay and help me?"

Buffy nodded, exchanging a look with Spike before he left the room.

"I think the roast is just about done," Joyce stated, looking into the oven. "If you cut up those tomatoes I'll take the cucumber and then I believe we're ready to serve this meal, don't you?"

Buffy opened her mouth to respond, but then changed her mind and moved around to stand by the cutting board, grabbing the knife already lying there and beginning to work on the tomatoes.

"So you... recognize him?" she finally had to ask and Joyce, pottering about with the rise as she put it on a serving dish, seemed to pause before she replied in a lowered voice:

"It's kind of hard forgetting someone you've hit over the head with an axe, especially after HE was the one who had to remind you of it! What is he doing back here? The last time I saw him he was bereft over some woman who had hurt him very badly and one moment he was practically pouring his heart out to me and the next Angel was standing in the doorway, telling me to get away from him, right before YOU stormed into the house and threw."

She paused, turning her head to Buffy with a searching expression and Buffy filled in helpfully with:

"Spike."

"Spike?" Joyce repeated, as though that word seemed as far fetched to be used as a name if she had ever heard one. "Well then, right before YOU stormed into the house and threw 'Spike' down onto a table threatening to do all sorts of things to him and it turned out he had actually KIDNAPPED Willow and Xander and... Oh, Buffy, what are you doing with him? I thought he left Sunnydale, you told me he left! And... why did you invite him here for lunch? What was that look you shared just now all about? What is going on?!"

Buffy swallowed, putting the knife down as she faced her mother who was clearly waiting for her to speak up.

"He came back," she said, hearing how little her voice sounded and not sure she knew a remedy for it. "He's been back now for a while and I... Well, we... I'm..."

She trailed off under her mother's inquisitorial gaze, feeling how she began to grow smaller and smaller.

"Does he eat?" Joyce asked and Buffy's eyes widened before she replied:

"If he feels like it..."

"So, he's still a vampire?"

"I'm not sure there are any un-vampires walking around out there... Usually they just turn into a cloud of dust and so it's kinda hard for them to... walk," Buffy answered, seeing her attempt at wit having been completely wasted on her mother she bit her tongue and confirmed: "He's a vampire."

"And if he loses his soul, like Angel did? If he goes on a killer rampage and hurts you as badly as HE did...? What then?"

Buffy murmured something.

"What?" Joyce demanded.

"He doesn't HAVE a soul, mom," Buffy replied and Joyce leaned back on her heels as if hit in the face, her eyes growing so much they practically bulged before she stepped forward and lowered her voice into a whisper.

"Are you crazy?!"

"Mom..." Buffy tried, searching desperately for the right thing to say. "He's not Angel. He's nothing like Angelus... He's Spike, and he loves me. He loves me! Listen to me..."

"No, no, I won't listen to you. YOU listen to me. He isn't real! Don't you see. If you love him back it's like falling in love with a dream. And it may be a beautiful, wonderful dream, sweetheart - but it's still a dream. And one day you're going to have to wake up from that dream. It's better if you do it today than someday when that dream is all you know!"

"No!" Buffy shook her head. "You're wrong."

"Am I?" Joyce asked, watching the defiant expression on her child's face. "And what future does the two of you have? You will grow old where he will stay young forever. You will die, Buffy, and he will have to go on and on without you. You won't be able to... Won't be able to have children with him, will you? Please! I'm begging you, for your own sake, you cannot..."

"Stop," Buffy cut her off, keeping the tears at bay with force as she met Joyce's gaze. "All of that doesn't matter. All of that could happen even if I had a human for a boyfriend, you know it could. The growing old together bit is something we'll still get to do. It's just that my appearance will change, where his won't. And besides..." She trailed off when she realized she had been about to state the fact that Slayer's didn't exactly have a reputation to live until they could die of natural cause. "Well, I don't know if I can have children," she directed the topic away from that road. "All the kicks I receive all the time... We'll... adopt, if that day comes. Don't worry, mom, you'll have grandchildren. But now I'M asking YOU: please, at least try to understand. He means so much to me, and if you just get to know him I KNOW you'll like him. I know you will. Please... say you'll give it one tiny chance."

Joyce hesitated.

There were a lot of contradictory emotions dancing within her in that moment. A big part of her remembered Angel and what she had actually done to make sure that her daughter would have the same opportunities in life as any other young woman her age. It turned out it had all been for nothing. Here her beloved child was, so strong and proud and sure of herself, professing her devotion to yet another of the being's she was supposed to be slaying.

Why did she have to keep falling in love with them? Couldn't she simply get rid of them BEFORE they could actually hold a normal conversation with her?

Joyce smiled at that thought and then she shook her head with a sigh.

"You're old enough to make your own choices, Buffy," she said. "And I couldn't let something as trivial as a boy come between us."

Buffy smiled back at that, embracing her mother and as they pulled apart she had to remark:

"He's like a hundred years older than you... Don't think he qualifies to be put under the 'boy' category."

Joyce seemed to grow pale for just a second, and then she laughed.

"This is going to take some getting used to, I tell you," she stated and Buffy smiled at her.

"Are we having red or white with dinner?" Spike asked as he entered the kitchen, looking at the two bottles he held in either hand before he looked up.

"Let me see which ones you chose," Joyce replied and Buffy watched them as Spike came up to stand beside the former, enabling her to read the labels. "Oh, you have excellent taste," she commended and Spike smiled tentatively at her before he gave a small shrug with one shoulder.

"I spent some time in France..." he said and Joyce's eyebrows rose with interest.

"Really? During which decade?" she asked and Spike stared at her, rather surprised, before he smirked and replied:

"The twenties and some during the thirties."

"Fascinating... You know, I've always thought England to be at it's most interesting during the late eighteen and early nineteen hundreds, would you say that that was an accurate observation?" she then inquired, bending down as she grabbed the oven mittens and pulled them on, opening the oven and taking the roast out before she closed the former again again.

"I couldn't tell you of the late eighteen hundreds, I had a small problem with hatchets and burning torches greeting me everywhere I went during that time and so I thought it best to leave the country 'til it all boiled over," he answered and Joyce glanced at him before she shook her head.

"I hope it taught you a lesson," she said and he looked at Buffy, who merely shot him another smile of encouragement and he turned back to Joyce as he answered:

"It did... Just took a while for it to sink in."

"Let's have red, shall we?" Joyce said, in reference to the reason the vampire had even entered the kitchen in the first place, as she picked up the dish now harboring the meat and walked passed him. "We can save the white for dessert. Buffy, grab the rise. And what about England during the early nineteen hundreds?" she then asked as Spike followed her into the dining room.

Buffy could hear him reply and she smiled to herself as she grabbed the rise in one hand and the bowl with salad in her other before she followed the other two.

Yes, everything was clicking into place.

Finally.

**************************************************************************** **************************************************************************** **************************************************************************** ******************

*********************************TRAppED*****************************

Fifty: All That Matters

By Annie

2003-08-05

***********************************************************************

Day Thirty-Eight.

11.15 p.m.

"All right, good night, you two!" Joyce said, smiling as Buffy took a step forward to give her a peck on the cheek.

"Night, mom," the younger woman replied, returning the smile and stepping back to join Spike at his side, where she previously had been.

He had his hand on the doorknob, the door standing ajar as he waited for the other two to say their good-byes. He felt as though the smirk he wore was actually dreadfully close to stupid, but he couldn't get rid of it. He had thought the evening would be a nightmare. That, now that Joyce knew what he was to his daughter, she would be cold and distant; making it perfectly clear to the both of them how condemning she was of their budding relationship. But she had kept on with her questions and queries of his life and the world as it had been. Given the trade she was in he supposed her curiosity was natural, though he had been surprised how superbly humoristic she actually was of him not having a heart beat.

He had, of course, tried to steer clear of the more dark parts of his own history, but at times they had still managed to shine through - during which her mood grew slightly more reprimanding and her gaze even more so as she let it rest in his. At those times he truly had had to fight not to simply break eye contact.

"Good night, Joyce," he said, inclining his head and she turned hers in order to look at him. She still wore her smile and his smirk grew into mirroring it. "Thank you for dinner," he added and her smile widened at that. "You're really something in the kitchen," he flattered and now she laughed.

"Well, it's easy to be something of something when you have such well- mannered guests, isn't it?" she replied and now he smirked again.

"Well, it's simple to be well-mannered when you feel you're being welcomed. Innit?" he retorted and Buffy smiled at them before she intervened.

"I'm sure you could stand here for another hour exchanging pleasantries," she said, "and it's all good... But I have a lot I wanna talk over with my..." She trailed off, getting a suddenly warm expression in her eyes as she turned them on Spike and he smiled a little, reaching out a hand to take hers and having the emotion she instilled surge throughout him.

Joyce looked at them for a moment, then shook her head.

"You're right, of course," she sighed. "But let's see each other SOON, okay?" she added with a stern look at her daughter, who smiled and nodded her agreement.

Then she turned and walked through the door, pulling Spike with her, and with another round of "good nights" they closed the door behind them.

They paused on the doorstep, gazing into the night with unmistakable relaxation before they took the few steps and proceeded toward the sidewalk. They stayed silent for several blocks, enjoying each others company enough as it was and both unwilling to disturb the stillness.

It reminded Buffy of the walk they had shared home from the grassy hill where she had first admitted her dawning affections for him. They had been then as they were now and she couldn't help but turn her head and look up at him. He kept his gaze faced forward for a few moments and then smiled a small smile before he turned it to meet hers.

"Well, that went well," he finally said and Buffy let out a giggle before she stopped and put her arms around him.

"It's... so strange," she mumbled and he furrowed his brow, though she couldn't see it as his face was buried in her blonde locks. "To feel like I really have you... Like this is... happening," she added. "It's so liberating. I think I can finally breathe," she whispered and he held her to him tightly, it making her give a small cough as she pressed out: "NOT if you do that."

He laughed softly, releasing his grip as he pulled back to look down at her.

"So what was it you wanted to talk to me about?" he wondered and she smiled before standing on her toes and stroking her lips gently against his.

As she moved her head back and opened her eyes he did the same, looking down at her with an appreciative smirk on before he stated:

"I believe we can spin further on that subject, Ms. Summers."

***

Day Thirty-Nine.

1.14 a.m.

"You know what I've been thinking about?" Buffy asked, lying comfortably in Spike's arms.

They had decided to take refuge to his crypt, since they knew Willow was patient - but perhaps not patient enough to actually have them making love in the same room.

"What?" Spike asked.

"Well... that night when I... slapped you," she mumbled and he smiled at the memory.

"What about it?" he wondered.

"You said that no one had been able to resist you for that long... What did that mean?" she asked and he stirred so that she looked up at him and met his gaze. "What kind of relationship did you have with Drusilla? I just..."

"I didn't mean..." he interrupted, pausing as he searched for the right words. "'Seduce' can have different meaning, can't it? If it's with money or love or sex or power... or death," he murmured and she raised her eyebrows, at first not having the words come at her in their true meaning, but then they hit her and she blinked.

"Oh," she said, propping herself up on her elbows; eyes still resting in his as she observed him. "Oh," she repeated.

"Right..." he said, voice lowered, "I seduced them, easily... to kill."

"But you also added to the whole 'resisting' thing something like 'especially after you'd already had them once...'" Buffy remarked and he couldn't help but smile.

"You were really listening, weren't you?" he asked and she put on a coy expression which made his smirk grow and then it faded as he needed to find the answer to her words. "Well," he begun, "the 'kiss' of a vampire can be quite powerful." He moved her hair away from the right side of her neck which still carried the scars from one set of puncture wounds, fixing his eyes in her as he finished: "As I'm sure you're already aware."

She bit her lower lip before she looked away from him.

"Yeah," she murmured. "Wait... does that mean you kept some of them alive so you could feed off of them more than ju-...? Know what? I don't need details."

"Sorry, baby," he said and she gave him a calming smile to tell him that he wasn't freaking her out.

She wasn't exactly sure what she felt about it because it was so hard to transform his words into actuality; into what he had been and what he had done. Looking at him, feeling him, being near him - none of that made her think "killer", thus it was difficult for her mind to process the fact that that was what he still was, underneath. This, though, wasn't what she wanted to dig further into. And so she swallowed, then asked again:

"Your relationship with Dru...?"

"I'm not sure you wanna hear about this," he grumbled.

"Spike..."

"I'm not sure I wanna tell it," he added, looking close to pleading, but Buffy not only wanted to hear this tale - she needed to.

"Please," she therefore merely replied and his eyes seemed to see through her for a moment before he focused them in hers once more, giving a small nod.

"I can't analyze what I had with Dru..." he began slowly. "I guess a lot of it started with Angelus... Him being the self-proclaimed leader always ticked me off. I mean, we were a group of strong members and we didn't really NEED someone to tell us what we could and couldn't do. You know the kind of mentality the two ladies possessed, and Angelus was the only one who could even attempt to control them... 'Course Drusilla often tripped over herself to please him. To her he was everything strong and brave. He was like her father, her brother, her lover and her closest friend all in one... God, she was so bloody blinded, and so twisted, poor thing. All thanks to him..." Buffy looked away at that and Spike gritted his teeth as he watched her face, then grabbed a hold on himself and reminded himself that she was in HIS arms now, wasn't she? He continued: "Angelus was smart and fast and he seemed to have every single quality which I didn't. Cunning, self-control, instincts that had been developing over a century's time; and he used his advantages with no sodding mercy. I wanted to be better. I craved it almost as much as I thirsted for blood. I wanted to just once beat him at his own game... But he was always one step ahead of me.

"Drusilla had chosen me when she found me and turned me she chose me to be by her side and I was... but she still turned to Angel, she still went to him and his bed. She worshipped him. And I was more jealous of that than of anything else. You have to understand that I did love Dru, but... God, this is so hard to explain... I loved her in the way that I thought love was; she was like a piece of chocolate melting on my tongue, making me dread the day when she might just melt away. I knew she loved me too, and I knew she needed me, but I guess a part of me always expected it to in one way or another end... Well, it was sweet while it lasted, but now..." he paused and smiled a little.

"You don't have to pretend that you didn't feel something for Dru," Buffy murmured, though she returned his smile. "I mean, a hundred-and-twenty years isn't the kinda thing you just forget, you know?"

"Neither is your first true love," Spike replied quietly, holding her gaze and she blinked before she looked as though she was about to make protests when he added: "I just said that I DID love Drusilla, didn't I? What I was trying to tell you was that this, right here, is stronger; and it was bloody unbelievable to me when I first realized exactly how I feel about you... but over one hundred years or no - this feels more real."

She smiled a little at that, then kissed his shoulder before she moved the hand which had been resting on his chest and locked her fingers with his.

"So tell me all of it, then," she urged and he smirked.

"I'll tell you the most important 'alls'," he stated firmly and she rolled her eyes at him; which he completely discarded.

He looked for where he had left off and suddenly came to the conclusion of where his tale was heading. He swallowed. He didn't like this. Not one bit.

"So, Angelus was the head of the gang and I detested it with fervor. But about two years into our little families journeys we had to fight off a mob and for the first time we really had to do it together. We were bloody terrific too, I'll tell you that much... I guess it was the first time I gained some of his respect, and vice versa. After that we started to explore each other's strengths and weaknesses in a more... orderly fashion." Buffy raised her eyebrows. "You know," Spike elaborated. "Openly and not behind each other's backs... We had fun with it. We competed in everything, but on a kinda a more friendly basis... And finally we had an almost brotherly bond grow between us. I never thought it'd be severed, not ever! But then the nineteen hundreds came to a close, and so did our family..."

He trailed off, looking thoughtful and Buffy wondered if he mourned times that could have gone by with all four of the Scourge still together, in stead of just the duo of him and Drusilla.

That wasn't even close to what was on his mind. Something else had happened in the beginning of the twentieth century. Spike just wasn't sure if he was ready to speak so openly about something that was sure to affect her in a way that was not even in the outer vicinity of good.

"I told you about how I couldn't stand Dru being so tightly linked to Angelus that it didn't seem like she'd ever give him up to give herself to me completely... All my life I'd had to live with second place and I refused to do it in this life as well. When Angelus first told me the story of the Slayer I was more than intrigued by it; it became an obsession with me. Even Angelus seemed to hold a slight awe for the legend of the vampire killer, though he had never encountered her. And in this I saw it: my chance. And I sure as hell was gonna take it. It'd be twenty years till I actually got to prove to myself that I could do what I had decided by the last word of Angelus' story to do... You asked me where I got this, remember?" he wondered, letting his free hand grace the scar of his left eyebrow and she seemed to have stopped breathing as she slowly nodded her head. "It was during the Boxer rebellion, and the young Chinese who gave it to me was the first Slayer I tracked down and killed."

Buffy felt a twinge near her heart as she had the vivid picture of Spike biting through the tender skin on the woman's neck flying through her head, and she finally drew a small breath when she realized that she had been holding it for so long. She could have felt disgusted, outraged, abhorred or violated. But all she could really feel was a sudden pity as she read the weary and close to frightened look in his gaze as he watched her face with clear apprehension of what her reaction would be.

"Go on," she merely said, in lack of anything at all better, before she gave the hand she was holding a short squeeze.

It seemed to ease his worries at least a tad as he nodded.

"I guess this was the first time I felt as Angelus' equal. Doing something he had never done and succeeding in it. And it was what made me very suddenly earn close to all of Dru's affection, the last link with Angelus broke when we found out that he was souled. She was all mine after that, and in a way that was all I had ever wanted anyways. The travels, the different continents, the experience, the fights, even the kill - it didn't matter to me if she wasn't by my side. When the family was splintered in different directions a part of me hated Angelus with force for leaving without saying a bloody word to any of us. He just sodding up and disappeared... But another part reveled in it, loved that he betrayed Dru. Well, it wasn't till years and years later that we stumbled across the story of his cursed state."

He stopped, gazing up at the ceiling with another one of those faraway glances and Buffy rested her head in one hand in order to look at him for the while it took him to bring himself back to her.

"Drusilla," he then spoke up, "was a huntress if I ever saw one. She was cruel. She was beautiful. She moved with such grace and precision once she had targeted her prey that I could stand in the far corner of a room and still be able to tell whom she had in mind for herself. She taught me a lot of things, but most of all I think she brought out the resources which was born into me with her bite... She showed me how to use them. She loved to watch me charm and yes, seduce, a much too willing victim. She always demanded I share... which I did with pleasure... We were both deadly, but together we were nearly invincible. The passion we shared for everything we did..." He suddenly huffed, shook his head and turned his eyes once more in Buffy's before he said: "Everything was painted with blood. Everything we ever had between us was painted - IS painted in the blood of all of those we killed and I..."

Once again he trailed off, but this time he looked down at her and kept his gaze in hers before he quietly finished:

"I don't want that anymore. It feels far away... unimportant. The past."

She smiled at that, and then nodded.

"Buffy," he said hesitantly, making her wait a few seconds before he slowly continued: "What you said to your mom... about you and me... Did you mean it?"

Buffy looked at him for a long moment before she pulled up and kissed him softly on the lips.

Spike knew that that wasn't exactly an answer, but he also understood that she had been forced to state her case to her mom in a very firm manner, or it probably wouldn't have made an impact. And so, in light of the "no" or the wavering "I'm not sure" he could have gotten, he was quite happy about that kiss. Perhaps not satisfied, but happy.

"All I really know," she said as she pulled away from him again, "is that I wanna spend tomorrow with you. And I'm sure I wanna spend the next day with you too... but..."

"I know," he cut her off. "I know... but I can't help but bloody think of all the things your mom talked about. And you once said yourself that you'd want kiddies... a real family... I couldn't give you th-..."

"Spike," she stopped him, shaking her head a little. "One step at a time," she then smiled and he returned it before he ran his hands through her hair to let them rest behind her head.

"I love you," he whispered and she closed her eyes, letting her forehead softly rest against his.

"That's all that matters to me," she mumbled right before she placed another kiss on his mouth.

***

9.29 p.m.

"Leloch, Spike. Turundra ini surgh?"

Spike smirked, then inclined his head to the demon standing before him.

"Goraglog fidd," the bleached blonde replied. "Leloch etis achlah'ar." The demon gave a nod as well. "Rewtah'ar sott krid tozth," Spike finished, holding up two fingers.

The other demon reached up a hand and scratched its bald head as it seemed to consider what the vampire had just said and then it smiled with fleshy lips, showing off two rows of perfectly fitted fangs in either jaw, before it once again nodded.

"Krid tozth sott etis loora," it chuckled as Spike handed over a bag made of thick velvet and the demon brought out a wad of American dollars.

Carefully selecting two one-hundred dollar bills it then gave them to Spike. The other demon put the bag inside its cloak and made as to turn away when it seemed to pause itself.

"Crulach," it said hesitantly, turning back to Spike and observing the latter for a few seconds before it finished: "tetil sulaha'ar conva sira slayeralitc?"

"None of your business, mate," Spike stated with a dark look flashing in his blue eyes and the demon smiled widely before it gave a small bow and then quickly left the alley - in which the two had set a meeting.

Spike looked down at the money in his hand and then he stuffed it into one of the pockets of his duster before he proceeded the opposite way down the alley.

No more of this, he thought as he rounded the corner of the building and headed for the crypt. The Doctor's office is officially closed.

**************************************************************************** **************************************************************************** **************************************************************************** ******************

Next