XANDER: Oh, no! Spike the place is worse then when I left! You didn’t even fix the drip!
SPIKE: Don’t turn around.
XANDER: Spike, what is it, what happened?
SPIKE: Don’t look at me. I shrunk them. Bleeding shirt, trousers. I hate this place.
XANDER: You know I’m not any happier about you wearing my stuff than you are.
SPIKE: Go out, get me some decent stuff, and I want more blood.
XANDER: No! You’re not a guest.
SPIKE: You want me to tear this place apart, you bloody poof?
XANDER: That’s it! I am way past due with you. I hate to break it to you, oh impotent one, but you’re not the big bad anymore, you’re not even the kind of naughty. You’re nothing but a waste of space – my space! And as much as I always got a big laugh watching Buffy kick your shiny white bum, as much as I know I can give you a little bum-kicking myself right now, I’m here to tell you something -- You’re not even worth it. - I’m out of here.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
SPIKE: Good bye, Dru. See you in hell.
WILLOW: What are you doing?
Spike: Bloody rot. Can’t a person knock?
WILLOW: What were you doing?
XANDER: You were trying to stake yourself!
SPIKE: Fag off! - It’s no concern of yours.
XANDER: Is, too. For one thing that’s my shirt you’re about to dust. For another, we’ve shared a lot here. You should have trusted me enough to do it for you.
WILLOW: Xander!
XANDER: What? He wants to die, I want to help.
WILLOW: It’s ooky. We know him, we can’t just let him poof himself!
SPIKE: Oh, but you can. You know I’d drain you drier than the Sahara if I had half a chance. And besides, I’m beyond pathetic. Stuck in this basement washing skivvies for a blighter I wouldn’t have bothered to bite a few months ago.
XANDER: Hey!
SPIKE: I mean, am I even remotely scary anymore? Tell me the truth.
WILLOW: Well, the shirt is kinda – not very threatening – and the short pants, but you know it could also be because I know you can’t bite, which I guess isn’t really what you need to hear right now, is it?
SPIKE: Stop, please, just clear out.
XANDER: Fine. But you break anything else while we’re gone and you’ll be sleeping in the garage, buster.
WILLOW: We can’t leave him here like this! We’ll have to take him with us to the museum.
SPIKE: Oh, you go on. I won’t do anything. I feel better now. Promise.
XANDER: Think of the happy. If we don’t find what we’re looking for, we face an apocalypse.
SPIKE: Really? You’re not just saying that?
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
BUFFY: Be careful you guys, the place doesn’t look to stable.
SPIKE: Fine by me. Hope we all go under.
BUFFY: Why is he even here. It’s not like he can fight!
WILLOW: If we leave him alone, he’ll stake himself.
BUFFY: And that’s bad because...? - Fine. Whatever. Just keep him out of the way. I do *not* have time for this.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
SPIKE: No pain! (He hits the demon again) I can hurt a demon! That’s right. I’m back. And I’m a BLOODY ANIMAL! Yeah!
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
SPIKE: What’s this? Sitting around watching the telly while there’s evil still a foot. That’s not very industrious of you. I say we go out there (Rubs his hands together) and kick a little demon ass! (Xander and Willow stare up at him) What, can’t go without your Buffy, is that it? Too chicken? Let’s find her! She is the Chosen One after all. – Come on! Vampires! Grrr! Nasty! Let’s annihilate them. For justice - and for - the safety of puppies – and Christmas, right? Let’s *fight* that evil! - Let’s *kill* something! Oh, come *on*!
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Thanks to Romance on BtVS for some of the screen caps!
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